Let's try again! Copy and paste the following and downshift until you have a fully elaborated on the action. Remember, a good writer adds a mix of action, description, dialogue, thoughts and feelings, and sound effects. Here we go.
The tiny began to run away from Santa's sleigh.
the devious little elf began to sprint away from Santa's sleigh with all the presents he wanted to get revenge on Santa for one year when he did not get his favorite present on the list Santa was watching very carefully but did not stop him the elves were going home everyone got there present except the tiny one he never wanted one again. Mr. Clause had a special present for the tiny elf that was the one the elf always wanted when he finished dilivering the gifts he watched the tiny elf open his giflt it was a .... DRUM SET he was rocking all night long
ReplyDeleteThe tiny elf began to run away from Santa's sleigh.The elf negleticly trudged helplessly as he reached out to touch my hand but fell as tears ran down his eyes.He looked like he fell astray driving home on Santa's sleigh and crashed down, down, down into the dense, dark forest.He also was fuming and looked like a big red tomato because no one went to help him.I noticed a pinch of red oozing blood on the corner of the elf's small stubby leg.As I stared hopelessly, I tried to think of an alibi for my mom seeing an elf with me!I mean what can I do? As I started home, the elf followed me inch by inch. Then, something struck me , I know,I'm going on a escapade bringing the little elf. I climbed into the sleigh with the elf right beside me. I slowly lifted up the reins and I levitated through the air! I was flying! My mission was to bring the elf back to the North Pole!''Ready set GO! Whoo Hoo!'' I sceamed as the sleigh raced away!
ReplyDeleteWow, Melinda!!! You used so many vocab words from this week!! Maybe we can start a new post just for stories using vocab words!! BTW everyone, listen up!!!!! From now on, check your punctuation and spelling before you post!!!! I want to see fourth grade work on here;) It's okay to make a mistake once in a while...I know I do sometimes...but make sure that you are going back and reading your comment before you post to make sure that you have good grammar, and appropriate punctuation and capitalization! Your writing is amazing!!!! You just have to make sure you edit it before you publish!! You guys are the best!!
ReplyDeleteOh and Allie, I love the idea of the little elf getting revenge and that he was rocking his drum set all night long...so cute!!
ReplyDeletethe hurtful little elf was trenching away from the sleigh where he was got run over every christmas but he said not this year there not gonna laugh the elf was waiting to impress Jonie his true love she always had a twinkle in her eye and never giggled at him but she was always off on escapedes with her annoying friends to stifle jack frost evil plans to destroy christmas but they were to good so they could never talk to her when ever there was a mission or secrect agent stuff they were the ones who were called for it finally Mr. Claus to leave for the big night but this time the little elf ran safely to where the others eleves were and held on too anything as soon as santa was telling the reindeer to go up up and away they noticed that roudough was missing so santa picked the bravest one or nicest elf and he chose the tiny elf yes he thought and gave him a magical power and they were off
ReplyDeleteThe tiny little elf skipped happily away from the crimson red sleigh. Tonight was the night all the elves enjoyed Mrs.Claus had baked star shaped sugar cookies a special treat before the big night.Maxi the elf was ready for a holiday meal!! The sweet aroma of the cookies and cocoa filled the cold and wintry north pole air. Maxi's BFF Ralphie caught up with him and they started chatting away like usual about how christmas was just around the bend!! "This night is going to be the best of all!" Maxi said with an extra hop in his step.
ReplyDeleteThe tiny little elf walked slowly away from the joyful green sleigh with a present in his hand.As he sat down near a pine tree he opened the present Santa had given him.It was a glistening horn,he loved it.He started playing it as a amazing sound came out,then he heard a CRUNCH from the sleigh as his friend jim came out.He came torwards him with his present that was already opened and scratched,from the crashing of the sliegh. it was a flute wich he always wanted, and then they played happily all night
ReplyDelete